One Question: One Person

If you had the opportunity to ask someone from your past one questions--who would it be and what would you ask?‍

So many times in life we get caught up in the "I need closure" mentality and fail to move forward because we don't understand someone's actions or behaviors. I have run into several people who wonder, "Why did my ex really break up with me?" or "Did they ever cheat on me?" And my answer remains the same, no matter what your question is, "Who cares?" Harsh, but true. We can't pump the breaks on life or put it on hold because of a lingering question that remains unanswered--the world continues to spin regardless if we get answers to all our questions--the important part is to keep moving, keep loving and keep connecting.

‍I was adopted 3 hours after my birth.

I remember fantasizing about asking my biological mother why she gave me away. I finally got the opportunity, at age 17, and she gave me a "sugar-coated" answer that didn't satisfy. And I was upset. And I was mad. And I was a hot mess.

At that age, I realized that it didn't matter why, it just matter that the action occurred and what I did with the opportunity. I never allowed "being adopted" play a handicap in my life. In fact, now, I kind of like it. I recently ran into my biological mother when I went to Texas in July, to visit my mom (some would call her my adopted mother, but that's just doesn't feel right to me). My mom asked me to invite my biological mother over for dinner and I did, and I was polite and I was engaging. And nothing she could have said at age 17 could have changed my direction in life (unless she updated me on a rich uncle that left me an inheritance!)

‍If someone breaks up with you -- it would be amazing to get a real response that you could use to grow and become better at dating/relationships, but if you never get an answer, you have to move on. If you get fired, you may never know the real reason, but you can't camp out at the HR office until you find out why. Life is a bitch that way. But it's that damn human curious nature that gets us every time. But if a Gay, Adopted Mexican can get over it....so can you