The J.Lo Relationship Syndrome — And How to Avoid it

DNA consists of the substance that carries the genetic coding of every living organism. Our Dating DNA is the foundation that carries our beliefs of how a date/relationship should be experienced.

You can change your Dating DNA to create a better outcome in your dating/relationship–but has someone told Jennifer Lopez?

Jennifer Lopez and many of you out there suffer from something I call the J.Lo Relationship Syndrome (JRS) but you no longer have to suffer through it. I will show you how to self-examine yourself so you can catch a flare up if you’re experiencing one. You know you’re infected when you hop from relationship to relationship searching for that “missing” piece of life that will bring you happiness not allowing yourself time to heal the “brokeness” inside. Don’t believe me. Let’s start with Jennifer Lopez’s dating/relationship timeline.

  • 1997 – Jennifer Lopez marries Cuban-born Ojani Noa
  • 1998 – Jennifer Lopez divorces Ojani Noa
  • 1999 – Jennifer Lopez starts to date Sean “P. Diddy” Combs
  • 2001 – Ends her relationship with Sean “P. Diddy” Combs
  • 2001 – Marries Chris Judd (really, same year?)
  • 2002- Jennifer and Chris separate
  • 2002 – Jennifer is engaged with Ben Affleck (when did she have time to date him?)
  • 2003 – Jennifer’s divorce from Chris Judd is finalized
  • 2004 – End engagment with Ben Affleck (what? really, Jennifer?)
  • 2004 – Marries Marc Anthony (when did their courtship being?)
  • 2011 – Ends marriage with March Anthony (although rumors say it actually ended 2 years after their marriage)
  • 2011 – quoted as saying she’s now ready for “Love to enter her life”


The J.Lo Relationship Syndrome is a serious problem that repeats itself unless caught early. A person suffering from JRS  has to give themselves time to heal from their last relationship and use the time to examine their Dating DNA to identify why their relationship ended. People who suffer from this dating syndrome fail to rub “time” ointment on their hearts. Time ointment is an important factor in over coming J.Lo Relationship Syndrome because while you’re healing–alone–you get to rediscover and reconnect with yourself. A person suffering from JRS uses relationships to falsely heal something broken or they have no concept of what she wants in a relationship. Many of us experience small cases of JRS but now there’s hope!

If you’ve just gotten out of a relationship and feel you are ready for the next one–make sure you can easily identify your Relationship Parting Gift. If you still can’t, then you’re not ready to date, much less engage in a relationship. I know we all want to be loved and I know for sure we all deserve love, but you have to have a clear idea of what “love” is before you can find it. It’s like interviewing for a job and accepting it and on the first day you start, you ask, “What are my job responsibilities?”

How to avoid J.Lo Relationship Syndrome: 

1. If you were in a previous relationship–you must have identified your last relationship parting gift.

2. Have a clear understanding of what love looks like to you. (Not Carrie Bradshaw’s version or any other fictional character)

3. What ideas/beliefs are collected in your Dating DNA and examine–which ones to hang on to and let go of.


Do you know anyone who suffers from J.Lo Relationship Syndrome? Have you ever had a small case of it? Leave a comment and let’s discuss.


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6 thoughts on “The J.Lo Relationship Syndrome — And How to Avoid it

  • Pingback: Building Successful Relationship » Blog Archive » The J.Lo Relationship Syndrome — And How to Avoid it | Nandoism …

  • September 28, 2011 at 1:20 pm

    And I heard JLo dated P Diddy while she was still married to Ojani…and she was dating Marc Antony while *he* was still married. She seriously needs to have a long period of time to herself, figure out who she is and then, maybe, she will be ready to start casually dating. I think it might be good for her to actually really get to know people before she gets seriously involved with them. Just sayin’!
    SoloAt30´s last blog post ..Summer Lovin’ Ended So Fast

    • September 29, 2011 at 9:54 am

      I wouldn’t doubt it– I mean there is some serious stuff going on over there!
      Looking at the timeline is freaky, right? But I know people like that. I wonder if J.Lo
      is there relationship hero?

  • September 28, 2011 at 1:21 pm

    I think it’s her karma for wearing fur 🙂

    I never realized how much she relationship-hopped. Yeah, how did she marry Marc Anthony in the same year she ended things with Ben Affleck? And now she’s ready for love to enter her life? What a fracking idiot.

    Great post, Nands!
    singlegirlie´s last blog post ..I Am Not Dead

    • September 29, 2011 at 9:55 am

      You might be onto something–it might be Karma.
      Makes me want to make my own dating timeline and repent!

  • September 29, 2011 at 10:37 am

    Nando –

    So well said. So many people just jump from relationship to relationsohip without a thought.

    I think I’ve dated a few JLo’s….the male version, though.

    As always, thanks for a great post!


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