Blowing the Door Wide Open on Butt Secks

Leave to me, once again, to go where no blogger wants to go, to the rear; I'm talking about "hitting it from the back". There seems to be an underlined stigma for people who participate in anal sex, yes, fudge-packing. (There's some imagery for you) And when it comes to being Gay, one might think it's the norm when meeting a mate; it's part of the culture, cause it's all we want...or is it?

No matter what type of sex you choose to have, it should be consensual, but also, you shouldn't feel pressured into doing it unless you want to. You might ask yourself, "How will I ever keep or maintain a relationship unless I give up the back-door goods?" Trust me, it'll happen.

Below are some questions I was e-mailed a few days ago. Here are some things to consider before you "turn around, bright eyes."

Side Note: Those of you who are straight, I guess here's one time, you're super glad you don't deal with the same issues, right? Unless you're dating a freak, and if you are...e-mail; I want to hear all about it!

1. Should I do it just to please him? What are you five? C'mon, no one is worth going against what your little Gay voice is telling you. There should never be any pressure to have sex, of any kind. If he leaves you because he can't get in your head and see how it's just not flowing for you, this anal-sex thing, then he probably should have been out the door a long time ago.

2. The thought of anal sex doesn't turn me on. Neither does the thought of plucking my nose hairs, but only one of these things IS A MUST! If it doesn't turn you on--then stick to the other things that do. Be open and set the rules--"I don't like it in the butt, NEXT!" And just keep it moving. Eventually, he'll get the idea. There's more to sex than butt secks. Try working on the connection.

3. Am I dooming myself to a life without a relationship? Only if you keep attracting like-minded individuals. What do these guys have in common? (Besides the doing the back-door disco?) I got 30 letters on this topic, so I know at least 30 of you exist.

4. Will I ever be comfortable with anal sex? How the hell should I know? Who am I, Miss Cleo? Maybe he's too big for you, is he black? Lord, try a new position or new lube--like Boy Butter, it takes the fussiness out of being a bottom by numbing you a bit. Child, you got to relax, release, relate!

5. Am I odd because I don't want to have anal sex? No, you're odd because you eat bananas with hot sauce, you need to stop that crap. Everyone's sexual preferences are unique and individual, like fingerprints. I've had people that write-in about fetishes, like the furry-fetish, which I never knew existed before my blog hit the world wide web.

Sex isn't everything, make sure you're good at one sexual act, like mouth-to-penis therapy and you'll be just fine!