Our Wedding Cake and Why it was Baked in Brooklyn with One Direction Present

Our Wedding Cake and Why it was Baked in Brooklyn with One Direction Present

nando and german wedding cake photo

With over 20K likes on Facebook and high engagement from its customers raving about their baked goods, you’d think choosing Baked to make our wedding cake would have been a no-brainer but since we decided to get married a week prior to the actual date–we did a quick “on the spot” Google search for wedding cakes in New York and they were the first bakery that popped up so we placed the order. The customer service was amazing, we were asked when we’d like to schedule a tasting and responded with, “Nope, we’re ready to place the order now!” I know, can you imagine 2 gays in New York City leaving it up to to the cake god, but we did.

The only glitch we encountered were the wedding cake toppers which were not included nor did they sell them which meant it was up to us to find the toppers that represented us, our style, and our way of life — gay wedding cake toppers in New York were my obsession for the following week. Baked recommend Etsy, but the delivery dates were 4-6 weeks out and we were planning a random and spontaneous wedding — who knew wedding cake toppers were going to kick our ass like this?  Since gay weddings are still so new, the market for toppers is awful. I mean, if someone wants a sure-fire way to make money right now, at $200 per set, you can certainly create your empire quick. The problem I encountered…the toppers I did find were boring as hell.

After a week of searching (I was even willing to do Minions with tuxedos but I couldn’t find any) I gave up. It was Sunday afternoon–3 days away from the wedding–and I was on my way to get my spray tan when I stopped at Walgreens to buy some water.  I popped over to the toy section and there they were, One Direction figurines. They had only two left, Liam Payne and Louis Tomlinson. Honestly, I don’t know who these kids are individually, I just know Harry “did it” with Taylor Swift and I’m still waiting for that song to come out…Taylor, you’re slacking!

After a little make over with some black paint and a sharpie — voila, we had original (sort of) wedding cake toppers for our special day. And that’s how One Direction and Baked made our wedding day so unique. Our raspberry lemonade cake from Baked was delicious, sexy and beautifully made…just like our future together.

Here’s the link to our wedding video: Nando and German get married!


One Direction Figurines

The before picture of the figurines

nando and german wedding cake2

I truly love the lighting and how it captures the electric feel of the moment

nando and german wedding cake1

A little close up on the tasty treat.

nando and german wedding cake3

Capturing a true wedding moment.

By the Way Wednesday: The Dos and Don’ts of Maintaining a Healthy Relationship

Relationships-dos and don'tsWhat defines a relationship? What defines a healthy relationship? I’m sure the definitions will vary as do the rules/guides that accompany the partnership. I can only speak from my first person experience. And in my last relationship, I was very dependent on the other person to “make me happy” and that meant I expected them to do some: mind reading, carry the financial weight of the relationship, and  love me unconditionally without getting it in return. That relationship failed.

Now, being in a relationship for 3.9 years I feel like I’ve not only grown as a partner but I can honestly say I feel like I’m an awesome fiancé. And here are some of my learnings.


  • Take care of your teeth
  • Have sexy time!
  • Exercise both your mind & your body
  • Spend time alone
  • Pay for things on a equal basis, not equally (when the money-making ratio is even, then you can do a 50/50 split — if it’s not, make adjustments)
  •  Figure out what chores you’re best at and are willing to do & do them — have them do the same (this is not a 50/50 split either)
  • Take care of another when you’re sick
  • Remind each other of important dates, appointments, gatherings (don’t sit there waiting for them to mess it up–remind them)
  • Spend time together (it should still be fun to meet up and just “be together”)
  •  Make them laugh
  • Hand them a tissue if you do make them cry — then work it out
  • Encourage them
  • Learn to compromise
  • Brag about them in front of others — and mean it!
  • Give them space
  • Remind yourself of the relationship rules you two have established — and keep to them
  • Make them laugh some more




  • Remind them of their bad qualities over and over again — I’m sure they’re already kicking themselves over it on a daily basis
  • Make them feel guilty over mistakes they’ve made — let it go
  • Say “I told you so.” That’s a phrase that doesn’t take love to the next level
  • Wait until things are bad to “have a talk” — you should always be talking
  • Put them last on your priority list
  • Forget being in a relationship is only a percentage of wat makes you YOU — it’s not your entire IDENTITY!
  • Brag about your relationship on social media
  • Forget to have sexy time!
  • Talk behind their back
  • Let them guilt you into anything
  • Forget your friends — but if they are anti-relationship, be wary!
  • Lose yourself in the process



I’m sure these are ever-changing, but these are a good start. And I’m positive I have left several things off — feel free to include them in the comments below.


Miami and in Love – The 2013 Vacation Chronicles

on south beach miamiGerman and I went on a little Miami getaway a few weeks ago and stayed at the Surfcomber Miami Beach which to me, served 3 purposes.

1. to help us relax and get away from the city which can sometimes drain your soul of all creativity

2.  to get way from the daily tasked and not worry  about the laundry, bills, or things like, “Who forgot to buy the toilet paper?” And “It’s your turn to feed the birds, right?.”

3. to help us reconnect as a couple because after three years together, you start to forget what brought you two together.

And for me, a vacation means not having to do anything…except relax, sleep, relax and sleep and eat. And that’s exactly what we accomplished. Getting a little color on my pale skin would have been brilliant, but I knew I’d be asking too much of the sun and nature.

When you’re in a committed relationship, you can easily forget the goal of the relationship. You get caught up in work, career, school and so many other elements pop up that you need a spot you can escape to and reconnect and Miami hit the spot. For us, our relationship goal is to continue having fun around one another and learning what makes us tick as we evolve and grow as individuals.

Here are a few other highlights from our trip.

As a couple, how do you relax and reconnect? Leave your comment below.



german 1 nando 1 nando 3


Are You Designing Your Own Love Catastrophe?

You are the designer of your own catastrophe — especially when it comes to love. You have reasons why you can’t find “the one” or you’re just too busy or ain’t nobody got time for dat! Those aren’t reasons, those are excuses.

When we use excuses to rationalize our failures, especially when dating, it really is a reflection of you and your flaws. And guess what? Everyone has flaws. You’re not alone. But here’s the difference, they are willing to still put themselves in a vulnerable place.

Can you say the same?

If you look around, no one is in a perfect relationship, they don’t exist. What does exist though? The possibility of finding and creating a relationship that brings joy, love, and vulnerability into your life. Yes, vulnerability. I know what you’re thinking, “But that makes me a target for getting hurt!” Guess what? You’re already hurting. You’re just doing it alone.

What thoughts are keeping you from truly finding joy when it comes to dating?

  • He’s not moving fast enough? Who made you the pace keeper?
  • She’s not the total package? Have you seen the wrapping paper you come in?
  • I need someone who understands me 100%. Mind readers are at the circus find one, pay them $.25, and keep it moving.

Or are your designs more destructive because they highlight what’s wrong with you?

Have you been designing a

  • 10-year sculpture of “I’m not good enough”
  • An oil canvas of “I’m really not worthy” that’s almost done
  • Maybe an intricate installment made of self-hate pieces with specs of shame

Would you be proud to display them? Because you already are. Check your last 10 Facebook status updates. They tell more about you than you ever thought.

If the current life design is not working in your life — start a new one.

Change mediums, change formats, throw away your old tools and start fresh–the old stuff (the past) is contaminated.

Identify + write down 5 of your best qualities and splash, stroke, weave, bend, glue, weld–start a new beautiful design you’re proud to have on display.

The universe and love is waiting with anticipation.

Find Your Soulmate Online in Six Simple Steps with Dr. Diana Kirschner

Find your soulmate online in 6 simple steps by Dr. Diana Kirschner
Find your soulmate online in 6 simple steps by Dr. Diana Kirschner

Dr. Diana Kirschner was a frequent guest on The Today Show and starred in the PBS TV Special Finding Your Own True Love. She is the best-selling author of Love in 90 Daysand—just out now on Kindle— Find Your Soulmate Online in Six Simple Steps.  Dr. Diana has helped thousands all over the world use online dating in the most wonderful way—to find a passionate lasting Soulmate connection!  Her free Dating Tips & Relationship Advice newsletter is available at www.lovein90days.com.

And in today’s post, Nando interviews renowned relationship expert + best selling author Dr. Diana Kirschner to help you get one step closer to love.

In this interivew we will discuss the do’s and don’ts of online love + explore the great advice Dr. Diana Kirschner has on finding true love via the internet.


  • The dos and don’t of an online dating profile
  • Catfishing + the money making industry involved in it
  • How many soul mates does a person really have?
  • 3 Things to boost your online dating experience–RIGHT NOW!


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