If you’re on a dating website, being asked to go on a blind date, or open to some app’s logarithm matching you up with your soul mate, then you’re putting yourself out there and eventually, just like the old lady with flowered pants, bad eye-sight and a wrinkled face at a Vegas slot machine, you’ll hit the jackpot–a first date. The first date is always a fine balance of nerves, exciement, a blank possibility of something, and high expectations–unless your serotonin levels are low, then you bring your friends, “I’m jaded” and “low expectations” along and that always makes for a fun time.
Let’s fast forward to the end of the date–when the small talk is over and both parties have already made a snap judgement of “do I really want to see this person again?” What do you do if you don’t? Should you lie, be nice or tell the truth on a first date? Before you answer, I’d like you to imagine your last shopping experience. You walk into a store because the mannequins in the window look hot in the display and you know you’d look equally hot (you choose to ignore things like backfat and that the mannequins body type do not exist in actual human form). So you dig through the racks and don’t find your size–but you REALLY want this outfit. Your next strategy is to look for a sales person and contact your higher power for guidance. The sales girl is rude and judges you immediately and barks the standard, “That’s all we have–there is NOTHING in the back” then walks off to gossip about you. Do you throw a fit? Or do you conclude that maybe this store doesn’t have what you need and you should go to another store, or try to find it online instead? Maybe you will find something similar elsewhere, not the same color or fabric, but maybe the same style and shape.
The same happens on dates. Maybe the person wasn’t the right fit. Maybe you can look elsewhere, another bar, a new shop, maybe look online? And when you find someone, maybe it wasn’t the shape, color, or size you had in mind (you know different designers have varying cuts), but maybe, just maybe, it will be the right fit for you–and not what your parents or friends think is the right fit, either.
Imagine a world where the dating process isn’t so much of a process but like a fitting room and in the end, if it looked good in the window but not on you–you move on with your pride and backfat and just keep searching in more of life’s windows for the right fit without throwing one.