Relationship Parting Gift (RPG)

I grew up watching game shows; anything that involved spinning a wheel vertically, horizontally, slapping buzzers, or just spitting out answers–I watched, with great interest. And I was fascinated with the idea of–even the people who lost walked away with a consolation prize. Sure, it might be a months supply of Rice a Roni (The San Francisco treat) as opposed to a new car–but when you’re growing up Gay, Mexican and Adopted–any little things counts because it was something you walked away with–a product you now have that you didn’t a few moments ago.

If we apply the game show concept in dating/relationships, I believe we would walked around a little bit taller, a tad more cheerful and feeling a whole lot better about ourselves. As long as you knew what your Relationship Parting Gift was (RPG).


  • Instead of free box of rice you receive a box of “You’re stronger & wiser now!”
  • Forget the 2 day get-a-way at the ski resort, you just got a lifetime’s supply of “Recognizing you deserve better!”
  • And you really don’t need a shiny new diamond bracelet, but you do need the sparkling knowledge of “You really can’t fix someone.”

Understand that  your RPG is something you get regardless if you want it or not–so shake your partners hand on last time, smile to the universe and walk out with our RPG and say thank you. I will say it again, when a relationship ends, we all receive an Relationship Parting Gift–the hard part is figuring out what it is.

Understanding what our RPGs are is not a simple task. It’s not like the universe shows you what’s behind door number two and unveils the idea of “I deserve a clean and open-communicative relationship” in a box. An announcer doesn’t shout “Thank you for participating in this year’s journey, Courtney, but you’re not leaving empty handed–you’re leaving us today with a 30-day supply of  “When you decided to be his mistress you also slapped a label on yourself which read: I’m #2.”

And you know those people in the audience that think they’re helping you: they’re your life line or maybe they’re screaming the answer they’d give were they to be in your shoes–well, those are your friends, your family, the Sex and the City episodes you’re referencing in order to help you out when you just don’t know the answer. Sometimes, with their help, the outcome is in your favor–but other times you hear the sound of the gong or the “wah-wah” music is cued announcing you just lost the final round.

But since society hasn’t advanced to those levels yet, it’s up to us to figure out what our RPGs are. And if you don’t figure them out–you’ll soon find yourself in another relationship going for the big prize but unfortunately will only qualify for  the RPG instead. Sound familiar?

Take time out from dating or relationshipping (to me relationship is a verb–an action verb) and discover what your latest RPG is. Let the universe guide you to appreciate it a little more today than yesterday.

If your dating life or relationship was a game show–what would be its name? And what Relationship Parting Gifts can you recognize from your past?

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11 thoughts on “Relationship Parting Gift (RPG)

  • September 20, 2011 at 10:04 am

    Oh lawwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwd!! you speak to me!!! there is always something positive we can take away from a relationship, the issues is having the desire/courage to find out what that is for you(because that would take self evaluation, and GOD forbid you have to take responsiblity in the failure of your relationship), also fidning out what your RPG is as soon as possible is important, some people take YEARS trying to find the silver lining in their past relationships, hell some people NEVER find it and they become sad, bitter, angry people punishing anyone who they have a relationship with in the future, carrying their raggedy Samsonite baggae from one relationship to another and then wondering why they can never find true happiness…..

    • September 21, 2011 at 11:21 am

      Self evaluation is very hard–and you’re right,
      it takes courage. Major courage. And yes, an RPG may take years to discover,
      but baby when you do find it–it will have been worth the wait!

      Thanks for popping by and leaving your thoughts!
      Do you have any RPG you’d like to share with us?

  • September 21, 2011 at 12:08 pm

    well…lets see…if my dating life were a game show…since living in NYC for 11 years where most guys eyes are on the door for the next best thing…it would have to be: Musical Chairs…now with more popular music, and less Musak!

    I’ve already received parting gifts such as the refrigerator (learning to stay cool under pressure) and the microwave (quick thinking and processing of information) as well as a love for all sad songs…

    and the music keeps playing until its me and one other chair filled with my Mr Right! =)

    • September 28, 2011 at 10:18 am

      You will get far–in life in general.
      I think your sense of humor is a great assest, especially when it comes to relationships.
      You parting gift, refrigerator and microwave analogy are brilliant!
      You will find your Mr. Right, especially with that amazing attitude of yours.
      Thanks for popping over Greg.

  • September 23, 2011 at 1:27 am

    What a great perspective, Nando. At least you got some Rice-a-Roni! And Rice-a-Roni is better than no Rice-a-Roni, right?
    singlegirlie´s last blog post ..I Am Not Dead

    • September 28, 2011 at 10:15 am

      girl, it’s a work in progress.
      How are things over yonder?
      Spill, sister!

  • September 25, 2011 at 7:35 am

    Love this post Nando for many reasons. I too grew up on those games shows and distinctly remember those Rice A Roni commercials.

    But to leave a relationship with something positive, rather than negative feelings….now that’s a thought.

    Thanks for making my Sunday morning!

    • September 28, 2011 at 10:16 am

      Hi Jordan,

      Thanks for your awesome comment. I checked out your blog,
      and I love the tone. Work it sister! We have to stay in touch.

  • September 29, 2011 at 10:42 am

    Thanks for checking out my blog Nando. And, if you can’t tell, love lively conversations. So do share your comments!

  • October 1, 2011 at 7:46 am

    Nice Gifts!
    there is also a new iphone app called JustUs which is cute to give it to your GF. Works for me!

  • October 31, 2011 at 12:59 am

    My most recent RPG: Relationships only work if you know what you’re looking for, and it’s almost impossible to know what you’re really looking for. I have learned that–similar to the SATC reference above–that my friends always know what’s better for me and that I really need to pay closer attention when they are beating me over the head with advice.


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